Are You Your Own Worst Enemy?

It might show itself as negative self talk. "I'm terrible / useless / stupid at this". "There's no point trying as I have failed before". Or "I'm too fat / thin / ugly / boring". 

It might be unhealthy habits such as junk food, no exercise, emotional eating or not enough sleep. It might be procrastination and not finishing what you've started. 

Or it might be taking on a critical or negative comment from someone else, and believing it to be true. 

I have done ALL the above at different times throughout my life, and more. 

Being my own worst critic was demotivating and made me feel terrible. It also didn't help me to achieve my goals. I have over time built my self confidence up and learnt how to turn the inner critic down. 

There's many reasons why we self-sabotage ourselves. Fear of failure, low confidence or growing up with negative patterns can all lead to this behaviour. 

The benefits of reducing self-sabotage behaviour include increased confidence, happiness and energy. It can also reduce stress levels, and create more resilience to bounce back from challenges. 

There are 5 simple ways you can stop being your own worst enemy and become your own biggest cheerleader instead: 

1. Know your strengths. Write down what you know you do well, what you love about yourself, and what makes you unique. Ask trusted family or friends what they think your strengths are. Create a strengths list or mindmap that you can use to help build your confidence.  

2. Change your inner voice's tune. Listen to your self talk and replace negative words with positivity, encouragement and self-love. Congratulate and celebrate yourself on your progress and achievements, whether big or small. 

3. Identify your self sabotage actions. What habits or actions do you know are no good for you or are no longer serving you? What steps can you take to replace these with nourishing and loving actions? 

4. Set realistic (and inspiring) goals. If goals are too high, we can tend to give up before we even begin to make real progress. Create realistic goals that also inspire you to take positive and consistent action. 

5. Don't take yourself or life so seriously. Things can and will go wrong - we're only human! We will make mistakes or the wrong decision. The key to bouncing back is to laugh at yourself, dust yourself off and try again. 

Loving yourself is the most important relationship you can have.